Preparing for Christmas in the Midst of Grief

Twelve Days of Christmas Grief Relief, Day 7

Yesterday's post ended with this promise: Tomorrow, we'll take a look at Mary's words: How can this be since I know not a man? How many times have you responded to unexpected circumstances with, "How can this be.....?"

And now I have to admit I won't be addressing those words today.  Instead of finishing up that post, I spent several hours with our fourth-grader grand daughter, Abby, who helped make stuffed grapeleaves and piles of fresh-baked Syrian Bread. From the first year I met Chuck, these foods have been part of our Christmas celebration - a symbol of his Lebanese family and now, in honor of his mother who taught me how to prepare these special dishes.

But while Abby chattered about everything from school friends to fighting with her brothers and how hard it is to be nice, I thought of those people shattered by deep loss who might stumble over this blog. I wished they could compare me almost 20 years ago at Christmas to these moments of joy. I never thought I would experience Christmas again without constant tears, and certainly little joy.  And yet, Abby and I giggled and laughed and talked about her Situ (Great Grandmother) and passing on how to roll grapeleaves. I wanted to keep my promise of Twelve Days of Christmas Grief Relief with hopes of encouraging such precious people who wish they could skip right over this weekend.

For so many years after the death of our son, tears accompanied every effort I made to "save Christmas" for our family.  Early on, I knew I could not recreate the joyful celebration of past years. In time, God created new traditions, new memories, for our "new normal."  Chuck and I talk about our first Christmas without Mark and some of the practical things we did to just get through that season. If you're fresh in your grief, perhaps our half hour broadcast on our website,
Preparing for Christmas in the Midst of Grief will encourage you to keep on keeping on. You can hear it by clicking the title.

Another picture of hope is an article just published in Today's Christian Woman, The Year I Couldn't Save Christmas by my friend, Tammy Maltby.  Divorce caused Tammy's wounds and her books and words are a source of great comfort, no matter what the context of your loss. Tammy's approach to broken places is similar to mine. 

I have much to share about our friend, Mary.  But for now, it's nap time!  And then our annual Christmas Concert at Glasgow Church in Bear, Delaware, USA.  If you are local, I hope you'll join us.  If you are in China or Russia or more than an hour away - check out Glasgow Church Website to watch online, starting at 7:00 p.m. EST.  It will be a memorable, eclectic mix of Transiberian Orchestra pieces, traditional, contemporary and always surprising music that will encourage our hearts to worship our King.

In His grip,
Sharon