Selfless
I was blessed to have a godly mother who was my best friend, life-long cheerleader, and persistent prayer warrior. There are many adjectives I could use to describe Mom – petite, patient, kind, loving, giving – but the one that tops them all is selfless. Whenever I read the passage above from Philippians, I think of Mom.
When my husband died suddenly at the age of 39, leaving me with two young daughters to raise on my own, Mom and Dad graciously moved from North Carolina to a house two miles from mine in Georgia. Though Dad sometimes lamented the loss of what he thought their retirement years would be like, Mom never did. She wholeheartedly came alongside me to help raise Mary and Jessie. There was no, “Look at me! Aren’t I great for making this sacrifice?” Instead, when I would thank her and tell her that I didn’t know how I would have made it without her, she would reply, “I couldn’t have stood it if we’d stayed in North Carolina, knowing you and the girls were here by yourselves.”
Thus, my daughters and I, and years later my grandchildren, were blessed by her loving care and presence. A few examples:
When my daughters were tiny and spent the night with my parents, they would sometimes become fretful or afraid. Mom would comfort them, then lie down by their crib until she was sure they’d fallen asleep again.
When I was working full-time and traveling, Mom would occasionally clean my house so I could relax on the weekend. When my daughters were old enough, she enlisted their help during the summer, teaching them the importance of putting others’ needs first.
Mom prepared countless homemade meals, not to mention pound cakes and cookies. She shared those goodies, as she called them, with friends, doctors, and service folks, including appliance repair techs, mechanics who worked on my parents’ cars, and emergency responders who helped restore power in their neighborhood after Hurricane Hugo blew through Charlotte.
Mom’s generosity extended beyond sweets. Whenever she shared something – fresh fruits and vegetables from the produce stand she and Dad frequented, or fragrant flowers from her gardenia bush – she chose the best for the recipient rather than for herself.
Each time Mom accompanied me to spend the day with my grandchildren, she made sure to have a small surprise for them, ranging from stickers and coloring pages to a sweet or salty treat.
Mom did not aspire to greatness as the world defines it. During her long career as a bank teller, she had opportunities to become a manager, but she was happy to remain at the counter serving customers, some of whom would wait in her line even when other tellers were available.
Similarly, Mom was content to serve at home, out of the spotlight, cheering on her family in their endeavors.
Interestingly, “Eulogy for a Godly Mother”2 is my most widely read post by far. I don’t know how much of the post people read, but I hope they read at least a few of “Mom’s Mottos” and put some into practice. I smile, thinking about how much Mom’s influence may have spread through that article.
LIFE-GIVING ENCOURAGEMENT
After the Apostle Paul instructs Philippian readers to put others’ interests before their own, he goes on to say:
Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
Philippians 2:5-8
Mom was one of the kindest people I’ve ever known. Selfless and generous, she delighted in serving and giving to others. The passage from Philippians always reminds me of her. Mom humbly put others’ interests before her own. Though she never would have been bold enough to say, “Be imitators of me as I imitate Christ,” as the Apostle Paul did, nor did she hold herself up as a godly role model, she nonetheless set a beautiful example for me to follow.
The best way to honor her memory is to follow her, as she followed Jesus, the One who demonstrated ultimate selflessness. Though I often fall short, one of the greatest compliments anyone can pay me is to say that some aspect of my character resembles Mom’s.
Although Mom didn’t receive many worldly accolades, I know her reward in heaven is great. She stored up much imperishable treasure during her earthly life. Her daughter, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren rise up and call her blessed.
PRAYER
Dear Lord, I will be forever grateful for the priceless gift of a godly mother. Please help me to follow her example of selflessness as she followed Jesus
2 https://patsykuipers.com/2021/05/09/eulogy-for-a-godly-mother/
Patsy Kuipers - Patsy often refers to herself as “Gardening Grammie,” a title encompassing two of her favorite pastimes. Widowed at age 38, she was blessed to be gainfully employed for all the years she spent raising two daughters on her own. When the corporation she worked for eliminated her job after a 30-year career, she returned to school to study horticulture, a passion born of caring for the garden her husband left as part of his legacy. Patsy relishes teaching her three grandchildren about plants and the One who created them, weaving stories of God’s steadfast love and faithfulness into their time together. She is a member of Grace Covenant Church in Dallas, Georgia, where she serves as an advisor to the Women’s Ministry Committee and leads women’s Bible studies. Patsy blogs at Back 2 the Garden (patsykuipers.com) to encourage others with the hope of the Gospel. She offers the same encouragement in her book, Be Still: Quiet Moments with God in My Garden. When she’s not writing or playing in the dirt, Patsy enjoys catching up with friends over a strong cup of tea.
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Sharon W. Betters is a mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, pastor’s wife, and cofounder of MARKINC Ministries, where she is the Director of Resource Development. Sharon is the author of several books, including Treasures of Encouragement, Treasures in Darkness, and co-author with Susan Hunt of Aging with Grace. She is the co-host of the Help & Hope podcast and writes Daily Treasure, an online devotional.
Contact Sharon with comments or questions at dailytreasure@markinc.org.