Philemon’s Choice
My friend Ashley pointed me to Philemon, and I've been captivated by God's wisdom in Paul's short letter ever since. My ESV and NLT Bibles together have led me on a journey.
Paul's letter to Philemon, his family, and the church that meets in their home is motivated by a request, a hard request, an invitation to live out the theology they have embraced.
Paul was asking Philemon and the church to extend forgiveness to Onesimus.
Onesimus, one of Philemon’s former household slaves, had probably stolen money and/or property from Philemon and fled to Rome.
I think I know the memories and the emotions that Paul's request aroused.
FORGIVENESS!!!
That's a big ask.
Paul's request is couched in affirmations.
I am praying... Paul is not assuming.
He is asking God to lead.
He is trusting his friends to hear from God.
He is trusting their mature faith.
He is masterfully building them up.
the generosity... Paul knows this is no small request.
Forgiveness is never a small request. Ashley was struggling too.
generosity that comes from their faith... This is not a people-pleasing request.
Again, he is acknowledging the maturity of their faith. How affirming.
put into action... Paul is trusting their theology will lead to application.
as you understand & experience... understanding leads to theology;
Experience is living out trust.
all the good things we have in Christ Jesus... Paul offers a framework.
He asks them to consider Jesus.
He points them to the power to obey.
Paul makes sure they know that Onesimus is now a Christian. In the sovereignty of God in the big city of Rome, Paul and Onesimus meet.
Put on then, as God's chosen ones… if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other as the Lord has forgiven you.
Colossians 3:12 & 13, ESV
I imagine Philemon’s emotions may still have been raw. I'm sure he hadn't forgotten.
Paul is praying that they will not respond according to their emotions, but rather according to their theology.
A few sentences later, toward the end of his letter, Paul adds this affirmation,
I am confident as I write this letter that you will do even more.
Philemon 21, NLT
It's been many years. I still remember. Forgiveness was offered and received. I practiced what my theology required. But the obedience of forgiveness doesn't cancel memory.
That's okay. When something triggers a memory, I have the truth of forgiveness counseling my heart. The memory is real. So is the truth of forgiveness.
...forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Luke 6:37, ESV
God is trusting me, as Paul was trusting Philemon, that I'll allow the memory to lead me to practice the truth of forgiveness again.
Because we live across the US from each other, we rarely cross paths. That was about to change.
Because of a mutual friend, we were going to be in the same city, at the same time, in the same room.
As with Philemon, the forgiven person was long-distance, and Paul is asking Philemon to close the gap... to welcome Onesimus face-to-face. There was a choice.
I, too, had a choice. I can avoid the face-to-face meeting. That was my desire.
But was that putting my theology into action?Was that remembering what Christ had done for me?
I chose to be present.
I chose to trust.
Zooming out on Paul's letter, there are two sets of bookends surrounding his request. One is in the word “refresh.” Paul notes in verse 7 that the “hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you.” The “you” is Philemon. Verse 20 asks, “Refresh my heart in Christ.” The “My” is Paul.
Those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.
Proverbs 11:25, NLT
The second bookend is the grace of God. Paul begins his letter by offering the grace of God. Philemon 3. His very last words also highlight grace. Philemon 25.
God's grace is the fuel that will lead Philemon's response.
...My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.
II Corinthians 12:9, ESV
As I drove away that afternoon in Colorado rush hour traffic, my heart was refreshed. God's grace was sufficient.
No wonder Paul's letter to Philemon captivated me.
PRAYER
Thank you for Your grace, Father, that You so generously gave during what could have been a difficult situation. Forgiveness is so hard yet so freeing. Father, please help me to quickly recognize when I need to forgive and to do so with the grace You offer. Amen (I've shared the backstory in the book Praying Through Loneliness, compiled by Kristen Strong.)
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Sharon W. Betters is a mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, pastor’s wife, and cofounder of MARKINC Ministries, where she is the Director of Resource Development. Sharon is the author of several books, including Treasures of Encouragement, Treasures in Darkness, and co-author with Susan Hunt of Aging with Grace. She is the co-host of the Help & Hope podcast and writes Daily Treasure, an online devotional.
Contact Sharon with comments or questions at dailytreasure@markinc.org.
